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Scotrid, the Haplous Genius - Authormatic - Bestseller generator!
2008 April 17th
08:10 pm

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Authormatic - Bestseller generator!

A Fastidious Night

CHAPTER ONE
After a while the torch beams of the other searchers turned into distant flashes of light and the voices became an occasional call carried on the wind and not definitely identifiable as animal, let alone human. Inspector Wicks looked up from the boggy ground in front of his feet as the moon came out from behind a black scurrying cloud.
   "Hot diggity daffodil!" His boot slipped sideways pitching him forwards.  Not only did he now have wet knees and a wet sock but he had managed to hit the only rock between here and Sheffield and he struggled to his feet ruefully rubbing his sore neck.  He was dog-tired.  What a night, what a really fastidious night, one which had actually started well, on his settee with a takeaway and a can of lager in front of the TV and should have ended a couple of hours later in bed with a large tot of his favourite single malt on the bedside table. Instead here he was tramping a particularly inhospitable part of the moor, looking for a lost kid called Cecile whose most recent school photo had covered the front pages of all the papers for the last two days. He groaned; damn this job; damn Crimewatch; damn the busybody public with their farfetched anonymous tip-offs. If only he was in bed, if only he was half on the sidewalk, half off, if only he was anywhere else.

Another thick curtain of cloud was drawn across the leering face of the moon, accompanied by a high-pitched whistle. Was that the signal? Had something been found? He struggled to avoid imagining what that something might be, instead his mind produced a sudden image of the diminutive timid bunny that had stalked his night hours in childhood, he squashed that thought too, a childish terror but not one to conjure up in the present circumstances.  He deliberately formed an image of his own small son fast asleep in that terraced house in South London, under the blue dolphin duvet cover that …… blue, something had been blue.  He swung back the torch beam, retracing the path it had taken, a child’s blue belt buckle.  Probably been there for weeks, blown away on a summer picnic.  It looked new.  Reluctantly but methodically he directed his torch over a 6 metre circle surrounding the blue belt buckle. This time white, the white curve of a small bent leg, a tangle of arms, neck twisted sideways, life-sized but not life-like, surely an abandoned doll, let fall and forgotten at the day’s end: and beside the doll, incongruously, partially obscuring its face, an all too real-looking icicle

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From:[info]adele_sparks
Date:2008 April 22nd, 09:17 pm (UTC)
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the diminutive timid bunny that had stalked his night hours

I used to know a girl who was terrified of bunnies....even diminutive timid ones.
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From:[info]scotrid
Date:2008 April 23rd, 02:45 am (UTC)
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Yeah, I thought that line came out pretty funny. But it doesn't go with the rest of the story. As a side note, I don't know how you strangle someone or break their neck with an icicle, as apparently happened here.

I told a friend of mine that if he ever actually took me out to help me get a girlfriend, I needed a shirt that says "Timid Rabbit" on it so girls would know I'm not going to be in their face trying to pick them up; they'll have to take the initiative. He said, "Yeah, 'cause that'll attract women.!" So I said, "Hey, if I even thought I had good ideas, I would have actually tried to get a girlfriend by now." I also figured the back of the shirt should say "Pusillanimous Lagomorph" just to pique the smart girls' interest.

There's a guy at work who hates rabbits with a passion. (They've kind of infested the area.) He's gone so far as to take pictures of his dog "killing" a stuffed bunny and tack them (the pictures) up outside his office.
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